A near-miss haiku

So I was on my way to the store close-by,
only to find out, once I got there, that it was closed.
Well hell, I thought, that saved me some money coz I’s about to buy me some clothes.
That’s what I call a close call
and less wear on the clothesline.

Written upon instigation by BlogFriday – seeking submissions for the word ‘closed.’ This haiku with its syllabic structure of 11 / 13 / 19 / 7 / 7 is not the only thing that’s a amiss here. Or a close call.

– Iself

in a not so sincere writing mood.

Die Ballade vom Fliegenpilz

Ein Fliegenpilz
gedankenversunken im Walde stand.
“Ich will’s”,
dacht’ er für sich im Sand,

und meinte damit
auf Flügeln das Fliegen.
Ein dienstbarer Geist der hörte mit
und wollte ihm obliegen.

Von Tälern und Hügeln
kamen sie ihm zugeflogen
zuhauf auf ihren Flügeln.
Ganz ungelogen:

Schon mancher, dem das Glück gelacht,
wurde anders beschenkt als er gedacht.

– Felix Morgenstern (© 2008)

I cannot explain it

I smoke, and the mirror
shows no smoke

In fact, the mirror
shows neither my pipe
nor my hand holding it

In fact, my face
and I
are missing as well

– Bhoot (© 1898)

Note
I pulled out this poem by my close friend Bhoot because Totally Optional Prompts' theme Smoke and Mirrors reminded me of it.

Microsoft Lottery (?)

We all know that Bill Gates is one of the shrewdest people on earth when it comes to sniffing a buck against the wind. It is also known that he's a great philantropist, redistributing oodles of his software user-earned $$$ to cancer research, etc.

What's little known is that he's gone senile and started the Microsoft E-Games Promotion Award, of which I am a lucky consolation prize winner, as I've been informed by e-mail this very morning. Yahoo! I've been approved to win an incredible 500,000 £.

All I need to do to collect is send all my essential data, including my mobile phone no. and a copy of an ID, to Bill Gates' trusted friend and caretaker Paulson Depp at the following highly official e-mail address:

mr.paulsondeppclaimmanager@hotmail.com

I'm sure Mr. Gates' generosity doesn't stop with me. I think that you, dear reader, also have the best chances of having won this award and should claim it just like me. So, despite all the severe warnings below, I've decided to let you in on this. Here's the text of the e-mail with all the details on how to go about cashing in:

Microsoft E-Games Promotion Award
20 Craven Park Harlesden
London NW10,
United kingdom.
Registered No: N.I 24284
***************************
Dear Consolation Prize,

CONSOLATION PRICE WINNING NOTICE

This is to inform you that you email have won a prize money of(500,000.00)Five Hundred Thousand Great British Pounds Sterling for the month of March,2008 E-game promotion Award which is organized by Microsoft Windows Inc. Your email address attached to the ticket winning number:MCPA09788 that drew the lucky winning number, which consequently won the Microsoft E-games promotion Award in the second category,in four parts.You have been approved for a payment of 500,000.00 Great British Pounds Sterling (FIVE HUNDRED THOUSAND GREAT BRITISH POUNDS) in cash credited to file reference number:MIC/WS68768P/68. This is from a total cash prize of FIVE MILLION GREAT BRITISH POUNDS Shared among the ten international winners that won the second categories.All participants were selected through a Multi international computer ballot system drawn from 98,000(Ninety eight thousand) names of email users around the world,as part of our international promotion programme.Due to mixed up of some names and addresses, we ask that you keep this award personal, till your claims has been processed and your funds remitted to you. This is part of our security measures to avoid double claiming or unwarrantedtaking advantage of the situation by other participants or impersonators.
****************************
PAYMENT OF PRIZE AND CLAIM
****************************
You are to contact this office for further instruction on how to claim your prize with this information.
WINNING INFO:
Amount Won:500,000.00 Great Britain Pounds Sterling.
Batch Number: 0094/AM6880
Winning Number: MCPA09788
Reference Number: MIC/WS68768P/68
****************************
CLAIM DEPARTMENT OFFICE
****************************
Claims Manager: Mr Paulson Depp
Office via Email: mr.paulsondeppclaimmanager@hotmail.com
Office Contact Number + 44-704-572-5696
Winners Care Line : + 44-703-184-6783

Note: The Verification and Claims form should be filled and sent to the e-games promo award manager who will immediately commerce process to facilitate the transfer of your fund to you. For security reason you are advice to keep your winning information confidential till your won price is processed andtransferred to you. This is part of our precautionary measure to avoid double claiming and unwarranted abuse of this program. Please be warned.
***************************************************************
WINNER'S VERIFICATION FORM AND CLAIM'S INFORMATION
**************************************************
First Name.:
Middle Name.:
Last Name.:
Gender.:
Month Of Birth.:
Age.:
Marital Status.:
Nationality.:
Religion.:
Occupation.:
Address 1.:
Address 2.:
City.:
Country.:
State/Province.:
Zip Code.:
Mobile phone No.:
House Phone No.:
Fax No.:
Email Address.:
WINNING INFORMATION
Batch Number.:
Number.:
Reference Number.:
A Scanned copy of a valid identification card should also be attached (either an International passport or Driver's License) and send with the listed information for claims of your won prize.
*************************************************************
Winners Shall be paid in accordance with his/her Settlement Centre.Microsoft E-games Promotion Prize must be claimed no later than 15 days from date of Draw Notification,that is after the Draw date in which Prize was won.Any prize not claimed within this period will be forfeited.Once again congratulations from the management of the Microsoft E-games Promotion on your consolation price winning,we hope that you will use the winning for good cause.

Congratulations!! once again.
Yours in service,
MR. Silviu Hotaran
(General Manager Europe)
POWERED BY MICROSOFT WINDOWS.
***************************************************************
CONFIDENTIALITY STATEMENT: The document accompanying this transmission may contain confidential health information that is legally privileged.This information is intended only for the use of the individual or entity mail address above.The authorized recipient of this information is prohibited from disclosing this information to any other party unless required to do so by law or regulation and is required to destroy the information after its stated need has been fulfilled.If you are not the intended recipient, you are hereby notified that any disclosure,copying,distribution, or action taken in reliance on the contents of these document is strictly prohibited.If you have received this information in error,please notify the sender immediately and arrange for the return or destruction of these document.

©2008 Microsoft Corporation.All rights reserved.

Image

My soul mate’s soul is like delicate silver,
Two lissome white seagull wings
Her feet,
And in her dear blood
Rises a blue intimation
Of things
All miraculous

– Peter Hille

English version by Johannes Beilharz, who writes:

In this translation I deviated quite noticeably from the German original, e.g. by avoiding the second person address and using third person instead ("her"), with the intention of rendering more the feeling of Peter Hille's poem or its inner intention, as I experienced it, than the actual words.

Peter Hille (1854-1904) traveled widely in England, Holland and Italy before settling in Berlin, where he became friends with Detlev von Liliencron (Germany's leading impressionist poet), Richard Dehmel, Rainer Maria Rilke, Otto Julius Bierbaum and Else Lasker-Schüler (who mystified him in her Peter Hille book of 1907). Lived most of his life in poverty, helped by friends. The Rowohlt Literaturlexikon 20. Jahrhundert (1971) calls him "the fragmentist of impressionism, who succeeded in recording momentary sensual and psychic impressions in an idiosyncratic manner." Along with Lasker-Schüler, he is also considered a precursor of German expressionism.

Peter Hille: Abbild

Abbild

Seele meines Weibes, wie zartes Silber bist du,
Zwei flinke Fittiche weißer Möwen
Deine beiden Füße,
Und dir im lieben Blut auf
Steigt ein blauer Hauch,
Und sind die Dinge darin
Alle ein Wunder.

– Peter Hille (1854-1904)

Von und über Peter Hille sind im Buchhandel und Online-Buchhandel, z.B. Amazon, etliche Werke erhältlich.

Distant greeting by telephone

I call you on the telephone:
Good morning! – How are you, my dear?
I’m listening to your voice’s tone.
It’s lovely, soothing and so very clear.

Through wire I kiss you on your distant ear,
You’re mine – aren’t you, my sweet?
How ever I hurt you when I was near:
Please do forgive me – I entreat!

You’re fine? – Great! – Worried about money?
Never you mind, the cost is not that much.
I have to go now and hang up, my honey.
Next time I’ll write to get in touch.

– Joachim Ringelnatz (1883-1934)

Translated from the German (which can be found here) by Johannes Beilharz.

Note
This poem was written in the days when not everybody had a telephone and definitely before the advent of free local calls or flat rates. If Ringelnatz were alive today, he'd have to rethink and write about wireless communication and e-mail. No doubt he would.

Copyright of translation by Johannes Beilharz 2008.

Ringelnatz telefoniert

Telefonischer Ferngruß

Ich grüße dich durchs Telefon,
Guten Morgen, du Gutes!
Ich sauge deiner Stimme Ton
In die Wurzeln meines Mutes.

Ich küsse dich durch den langen Draht.
Du Meinziges, du Liebes!
Was ich dir - nahe - je Böses tat,
Aus der Ferne bitt ich: Vergib es!

Bist du gesund? - Gut? - Was? - Wieviel? -
Nimm's leicht! - Vertraue! - Und bleibe
Mir mein. - - Wir müssen dies Wellenspiel
Abbrechen - - Nein "dir" Dank! - - Ich schreibe!

– Joachim Ringelnatz (1883-1934)

Die Gedichte und anderen Schriften von Ringelnatz sind im Buchhandel und Online-Buchhandel, z.B. Amazon, in zahlreichen Ausgaben erhältlich.

Jimmy Cain: Sliver

Me and my dawg Sliver

So I says to my dawg Sliver,
Sliver you know one thang

And Sliver yawns right
in my face and I
don’t like her breath much

But still I tickle her belly,
and Sliver she don’t
say much, just gives me a
quick lick and a blink

That one thang I’m talking about,
I says, is that life’s a bowl
of dog food – it sure stinks,
but I’ll have it in a pinch

– Jimmy Cain (© 2008)

My buddy Jim Cain claims this was inspired by Cafe Writing's February Option 4: Can You Picture That.

The above photo is by Beverly Lussier. Her artist page is here.

Some kind of passion

Passion to last from here to eternity

Momentarily lacking the necessary inspiration to write something myself for Sunday Scribblings' PASSION prompt # 99, I decided to resort to the services of the Love Poetry Generator as my best shot at a poem full of singeing torridity. What you do is enter a number of words in boxes. Here is the result:

M y L o v e

Your skin glows like the orange, blossoms grave as the rose in the purest hope of spring.
My heart follows your oud voice and leaps like a lizard at the whisper of your name.
The evening floats in on a great titmouse wing.
I am comforted by your slip that I carry into the twilight of zipperbeams and hold next to my lips.
I am filled with hope that I may dry your tears of dew.
In the quiet, I listen for the last thud of the day.
My heated mouth leaps to your bosom.
I wait in the moonlight for your secret strap so that we may undress as one, mouth to mouth, in search of the magnificient black and mystical delight of love.

American Life In Poetry

For more than a year now I've been receiving ex-US poet laureate Ted Kooser's weekly poetry columns called American Life in Poetry* by e-mail and have never before been so consistently diametrically opposed to a poetry selection. I've even come up with a generic term for the kind of stuff Kooser tends to choose: clod-stuck poetry. (Also see my earlier post Poetry and Abstraction.)

This poetry is all wheelbarrow. It mostly looks like it's coming from the William Carlos Williams corner of the American poetic tradition, but when Williams said "No ideas but in things," he meant that things needed to be transcended. And this is not happening in much of the work Kooser picks – things remain at the thing level.

*All the poems can be seen here.

– Iself

A historical perspective

These are a few things that happened on February 23s a while ago (courtesy msn encarta):

1847: About 5,000 American troops commanded by General Zachary Taylor defeat some 15,000 Mexicans under General Antonio López de Santa Anna near Buena Vista, Mexico.

Way to go, Santa Anna:

Heave her up, and away we'll go
Heave away, Santianna!
Heave her up, and away we'll go
All on the plains of Mexico

~~~~~~~~~~

1870: Mississippi is formally readmitted to the Union.

~~~~~~~~~~

1934: Casey Stengel, who had previously been the team's coach, becomes the manager of the Brooklyn Dodgers.

Hhmm ... don't see the historical significance of that, but then I've never been that interested in the Brooklyn Dodgers ... or any baseball team for that matter.

~~~~~~~~~~

1940: The Walt Disney animated motion picture Pinocchio, about a wooden puppet who longs to become human, is released.

Pinocchio, as I noticed last night, also puts in guest appearances in Shrek (2001).

~~~~~~~~~~

1945: U.S. Marines capture the highest point on the island of Iwo Jima and raise the American flag for the second time that day.

Clint Eastwood's Letters from Iwo Jima (2006) tells the story of the battle from the perspective of Japanese soldiers who fought in it.

~~~~~~~~~~

1997: Scottish scientists announce what they have kept secret for seven months: that they have cloned adult sheep DNA and produced a healthy sheep who they have named Dolly.

Dolly, who was apparently named after Dolly Parton, lived from 1996 to 2003.

Free from compositional rhetoric

Triadic Memories by Morton Feldman, played by Roger Woodward to abstract expressionist art and French and English spoken gibberish.

Ouw-oo!

"Let me down, let me down!"

"Yahoo! Dumped you in the croop you dirty breek!"

– Iself

Note
Reading about the composer Morton Feldman that he "began graphic works, with open pitch and rhythm, and music 'free from a compositional rhetoric' in early '50s," I decided to write poetry following the same principles. This is the first example of a poem that is free from compositional rhetoric. It is also quite obvious that its pitch and rhythm are open.

Retroactively attributed to Sunday Scribblings #107 – Compose.

Ein Gedicht der dritten Generation

Alpines Einfaltslied

Zithern schnaufen
in den Röcken

Traute Rauferei
an den Füßen
der Flüsse

Wo das Wetter
verschworen

Kuhglocken

(Iself nach Norbert C. Kaser – Original – und Achim Wagner – 2. Generation)

Illusion

Tier & Baum by Johannes Beilharz
Acrylic on paper, 2007

Is it an illusion, or is there something in there ... an animal, a tree?

Posted in response to Inspire Me Thursday's request – "Think magic… optical illusions… mimes… or any other visual trickery that inspires you."